Letting Go……..
OK. You got them to school. Phew. Now what?
So often life has been such a whirlwind to get to this point, you didn't think to consider what's next.
It’s a crossroads. Empty bedroom, empty spot at the dinner table, quiet where there was once commotion. No more jerseys to wash, rides to coordinate, meals to plan and schedules to sync. Wide open weekends and evenings. Pop up emotions like grief, loneliness, and sadness come out of nowhere. And a vaguely familiar person who seems to live here also, wait, that's the spouse!
But this is a good thing right? Didn’t you work all these years to get to this place? So why this melancholy? There is a lot of reinvention to do (and you don't have to be an empty-nester to experience this.) New contributions to make, while you keep your favorite parts of the past contributions. Moving forward doesn't mean you have to say goodbye to all of it!
I remember that season for myself. It was confusing and bewildering to experience conflicting emotions, especially since I really hadn’t anticipated any of them. AND I had the added bonus of making myself wrong for even having those emotions. I was pretty sure I had probably done all of it wrong.
Not true. But I did have to learn what was next for me and also my family. This part of our life together was complete, and a new beginning was ready. The very first thing I did was to take an inventory as to where I was, and where I was headed.
What did I want this next season to look like? Feel like? What kind of pace did I want to set? Slow it down or remain busy (so I didn't have to face my feelings? Just sayin!) What kind of relationship did I want with my now grown children? What did my friendships look like? Did they also need a refresh? Where would I find my purpose, my contributions, my fulfillment and validation going forward?
My son had taken those next steps for himself and now I needed to as well. The truth is there are many times we need to do just that. Pivot, reset and reinvent. In our lives, different seasons ask this of us. It's not one and done, you must continually adapt and be nimble as the times dictate. Whether you are just beginning your family life and partnerships, changing careers, caring for older parents and relatives, sending kids off to college or adjusting to retirement, reinventing is a useful skill.
As for me, when I was becoming an empty-nester I got a part time job teaching Early Literacy in the public school district. I LOVED that job, and taught Kindergarten - third grade reading for 10 years. What a beautiful place to contribute and belong (AND get my kid fix!)
From there I transitioned into coaching, and have helped many clients decide what their next step might look like, and plan for it. I combined my teaching and coaching background to develop my coaching program; “Momentum That Matters, Creating a Life you Love”.
In the program we explore your energy, wisdom and discernment for the next chapter. And make progress on your intentional life.
“It's better to have the future drive the present then the present drive the future.” - Ben Hardy.
A new beginning is a natural place for vision and dreams. When was the last time you spent time in that camp? It's fun to embrace the reset in a way that is aligned with the direction you're drawn to.
If you’d like to explore this, let's talk. Schedule a time. I can walk you through the program or just share thoughts on helpful next steps. It'd be fun to imagine together!
Above all else, I want you to know that there is no right way or wrong way to travel through this beautiful time. It's a privilege, and not everybody gets it.
You've worked hard to be here, and there continues to be a rewarding and rich life ahead for you.
“The connections we make in the course of a lifetime…maybe that’s what heaven is.” -Fred Rogers