Things I've been meaning to tell you
My client and I were talking a while ago. I asked her what was her most fervent hope from our coaching work. She told me she’d like to revamp and recharge her marriage. But she said it with a half-hearted sigh. You see, she didn’t really think that after all these years, her husband could change in the substantial way he’d need to for their marriage to refresh.
That’s when I delivered the best news ever. I shared with her that she could create the emotional life and connection she wanted without changing anything but the way she thought about it. Kapow! See what I did there?
Why Is this good news? It brings all of the agency for momentum to your doorstep. When you know that you can arrange your perspective on purpose you are not waiting for things outside of yourself to change before you get where you want to go.
I asked my client to write a letter to her husband. From a place of gratitude and abundance, write him a letter and call it “Things I’ve Been Meaning To Tell You.” They have shared decades together, raised children, had the jobs, all the things that come with a lifetime, if you're lucky.
Needless to say, many wonderful things came up for her, and in truth some difficult things too. She told him what she was insecure about, what she really wanted what she still dreamed of. The act of writing and sharing these with her partner made them said to him. She didn’t need to pretend anymore. It brought them closer with a new and beautiful and vulnerable intimacy. AND, other than some thinking, nothing else had to change to bring that about.
This was only one concept we worked on, but it was very powerful and has made a wonderful shift in them both.
Who could you write a “Things I’ve Been Meaning to Tell You” letter to? It’s a lovely birthday gift, or gift for anyday. Claim the fullness of your relationships. It’s right there for you.
“We are always practicing something and we get good at what we practice.”- Ling Twist
Practice the higher level thinking that brings about what you want. I can help with that, it’d be an honor.
Grateful for you,
Anne