Striving to Thriving
"I now see that owning our story and loving ourselves through that process is the bravest thing that we will ever do."-Brene Brown
My columns about Don Miguel Ruiz’ (DMR) book The Four Agreements have been a bit of a conversation starter! Thanks to all who have touched base with your observations and letting me know they are hitting home for you!
Today we discuss the fourth and final agreement: Always do your best.
(In fact if you are reading this on the day it posts, 4/6 and prior to 9am PST, please join us for Saturday Conversations: Agreement #4! Get the link here.
In the author's words: “Your best is going to change from moment to moment; it will be different when you are healthy as opposed to sick. Under any circumstance, simply do your best, and you will avoid self-judgment, self-abuse and regret”….. ummm, yes please!
Dr. Browns quote above resonates am I right? When we own our story , and love ourselves through the process, it is not only brave (as she mentions) it IS doing your best!
It sounds so straight forward, and we have been told since we were very young to “always do your best.” And then we grow up and ruin it!.
Through the years, I have watched what “doing your best” can mean to others. Some, who are so tied to the idea of perfection get this all strong (IMO.) They are under the impression that their “best” only means perfection. Not true! Actually, NOT possible!! It's a trap!!
They try too hard to do more than their best (perfection) and they take more time and more energy to complete the task, (or not) and in the end, it isn’t their best. They end up depleted and filled with judgment, or quit, which is failing ahead of time. This comes from the focus not on the task, but on the reward, result or feedback. Now that gets dicey.
If you’ve been here a while, you have heard me rail against the idea of perfection, and call it out as a lie. A place for fear and insecurity to hide. So many don’t venture into new and interesting projects, relationships, groups because it hasn’t all lined up just yet, and they might feel exposed or worse yet vulnerable.
Too insecure to be “in it” in case someone finds fault. Phooey! Believe me there would not be this weekly column if I waited to get it perfect…but you already knew that, and have told me so, which is why I love you!
Doing your best is more about the process than the outcome. DMR says;
“taking the action because you love it, not because you expect a reward or recognition. When you do your best you accept yourself. You know you are doing your best when you are enjoying the action. You do your best because you want to do it, not because you have to do it, not because you are trying to please the Judge and not because you want to please other people.”
This is the connected piece of your heart to your life. When you are doing what lights you up, when time passes with no effort.
“The things that light you up are not random. They are connected to your purpose.” -Erica Layne
Always do your best, what lights you up, your purpose. Magic!
Wouldn’t you like to narrow in and pinpoint your purpose going forward? Every season allows for this exchange. In fact it calls for it. Answer it.
Grab a cup of coffee or tea, and let’s privately talk about your “best”. Book a complimentary coaching call, and let's get you started in the direction your momentum needs to flow.
Being curious about this for yourself is the beginning of your amazing “best.” Let’s Go!