Rescue 911
I’ve been learning about Instagram these past few weeks. Posts, reels, stories and ads. I am WAY out of my comfort zone there. I’m pretty sure I’m terrible at it! You probably know I have an on-line coaching practice, and as such I am on-line connecting with clients and potential clients that have an issue in their life they’d like some help with. I love my job!
I can go to my website analytics and see people from all over the US (& beyond) who I will never know, reading this column, paging through my website and downloading my free tips and corny humor.
It’s fascinating to me. It is at once frustrating and satisfying, inadequate and creative, discouraging and rewarding (not unlike my golf game.) Want to know one thing I do to keep myself on track? I take a look at the thought in my head, something like, “You're not very good at this”, (or something equally endearing) and I give myself some grace. I look in the mirror and I say, “This is hard, but you are doing so well.”
Just that sentence reduces the resistance I may feel about my frustrations, insecurities and inadequacies. It takes the thorns out of it. I can relax. And while nothing has changed (except my thoughts) I am centered on the next thing. Back to spacious growth mode. It’s a little touch of self-coaching and it’s a lifesaver.
I also take a page from Dan Sullivan and Benjamin Hardy’s book The Gap and Gain. The premise is, we start something with a goal in mind. At any point we tend to only concentrate on where we are short of the goal (the gap) and not the progress we have made from beginning (the gain.) My mom used to call this looking at the hole and not the donut. I like donuts!
I find this so helpful. I wanted to share this technique with you to try for yourself. Did you know that on any given day your brain will produce up to 60,000 thoughts? I made a list of ten common unhelpful thoughts I hear from my clients. Then for each one I have provided a response. Get it here. Read through them and see what you think after reading the first thought, versus the feeling after reading the second thought. Any relief?
Being aware of the unnecessary and default negative messages we send ourselves is the first step to turn it around (unless you like to be your own doormat, then just believe your brain.) Most of the time there’s a better way to think of it. Takes some practice. I’m actually pretty good at it. I wasn’t always, the coaching thing helps! Try the list of ten for yourself and tell me how you do. I’m betting you’ll do great!
Have you jumped over to my website lately? There have been some big changes. All of my weekly columns are there for you (blog). You can read the ones you might have missed or the topics that might be more pressing now than when you first saw it.